Bluffmaster! (2005)

This movie could not get anymore weirdly Bollywood, honestly. I mean, the ending? And the plot holes? I feel very confused about a lot of things, and of course there is no way to unravel these mysteries. Fuck this movie for fucking with my closure issues, UGH. 

On the plus side, this is Riteish Deshmukh at his peak- he's so dramatically funny, and just the right amount of stupid and frustrated to be relatable. The dynamics between Riteish and Abhishek were lit (one cannot help wondering if the two bonded over having extremely successful fathers) and obviously much more entertaining than the chemistry between PC (yuck yuck double yuck) and AB. Abhishek, meanwhile, is charming as the conman who always aspired to be one since childhood- the kind of character you can't help rooting for. My favourite, though, has got to be Nana Patekar. There is a scene where he is literally worshipping his reflection in the mirror and that pretty much sums up the hilarity he brings to this movie. I had seen that clip before, but seeing it in its full context was a whole other experience. His dialogues were also A1- I had very recently remarked to a friend that I am two steps away from being Nana Patekar character level frustrated, and well, the dialogues and their delivery here proved quite cathartic, with the self-worship bit being the cherry on top. 

The very best thing about the movie is the music. Vishal-Shekhar have produced some of the best bops from my childhood in this album, and even the remixes (I still can't get over how they remixed Tadbeer Se Bigdi Hui Taqdeer) elevated the entire feel of the movie. Also, the meta references to Amitabh Bachchan were fun, and can be used as a drinking game. However, as much as I don't want to, I have to address the fact that PC (yuck yuck double yuck) was terribly miscast in this movie. The role called for someone with actual talent, and I can't even imagine what someone (I say someone when I mean Rani Mukerji) else would have added to the movie had she been cast. Actually, I totally can, but it hurts (Aishwarya Rai was supposed to be the first choice, and she would have done a great job as well). Priyanka just ruined things right when they were getting entertaining, and well, can't say I'm surprised. This was my first movie of hers in more than a decade for a reason. 

In conclusion, skip the movie and jam indefinitely to the album. Also, I must locate a hilarious "Come to me" meme inspired by an iconic song from the album and die all over again. Khuda haafiz.

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